“my children are human” by Bria Fields

I am not a mother
But I have loved and lost many children
I have seen them grow up and mess up
I have seen them light up when I was proud of them
I have seen them feel ashamed
I have seen them make mistakes and tried to convince to them that they are not mistakes
I have seen them cry
I have tried to support them
I have tried to let them go
I have tried to hold them accountable without making them feel worthless
I have tried to be there for them even though I can’t always be there for them
I have tried to show them their strength
I have tried to tell them it’s okay when they get lost
I have been scared for them
I have been scared with them
They have been so good
They have yelled at me
They have forgotten who they are
They have come to know themselves better
They have gone away and returned
They have gone so far away
They are lost
They are scared
They are good
They don’t know they’re good
I know they’re good
No one else knows they’re good
They believe everyone else
All they know is death
I am already dead
I am already alive
They are still dead
I want them to be alive
Have mercy, Father
Have mercy, Father
Bring them life
Bring them life
Have mercy, Father
Have mercy, Father
This free write is about my job as a group home manager for adolescent boys with substance use disorder and chemical dependency in a Christian non-profit. My children are amazing and they deserve so much better than our American justice system, because it really sucks and it writes off my children as deviant and delinquent when they are really just lost and broken. Please think about the children who never had a chance to make it and didn’t receive any opportunity to change, who never had a choice, and pray for them.
If you have any questions or are looking for ways to get involved with this population, please email me at bria1320@gmail.com.
~ Bria Fields

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